Congratulations x 2, Wesley. Our second pregnancy turned out to be twins, who are now 15. We were somewhat isolated from extended family at the time so it was hard. Fortunately my job at the time wasn't very demanding and I got by with little sleep. I heartily endorse what has been said about cultivating a support system - it will be needed. Mothers of Twins club can be a great resource - especially getting some of the paraphernalia like twin strollers etc. used and cheap, if that's a consideration.

Our twins never wanted to dress alike and we rarely had them do it. Sometimes we regret that because they missed out a lot of advantages of being twins (extra attention etc.) It seems that they grew apart for a while but in the last couple of years they've grown a lot closer. Still they have very distinct personalities.

My best advice is to give your wife lots of support so she will feel as peaceful as possible - this will help her bond with both babies at once. Encourage her to breastfeed if at all possible - that really helps too. Our twins were due in Feb. but born in Jan. They were so small it was difficult for them to breastfeed, so we mostly missed that opportunity and my wife still regrets it - especially compared to the four subsequent kids who each nursed until they were darn good and ready to quit.

Also, let the hospital staff know that you want to know for sure whether the twins are identical or not (they can examine the placenta) if there is any doubt. Not that it's very important usually, but they will be constantly asked and it's nice to have a definitive answer. We don't know for sure and now we're thinking of getting expensive DNA tests to find out.

Another question you will face when they start school is whether to have them in the same class or not. Usually the school will try to pressure you to separate them (it's easier for the teachers) but we found our twins had more problems when they were separated and we put them back together for a few years and it helped. I'd say keep them together in school as long as they want to be (i.e. unless they themselves have strong objections).

Again, congratulations and have fun.

Jon W.