Ahhh, but how could you be certain that the bottom in those various picks was indeed my own?

See I could easily Google 'big girls bottom' and deceive you into believing that the bottom/s in question were my own. While in truth I secretly possessed zero fat percentage razor blades for bum cheeks, and a cunningly secreted bustle.

No, all joking aside. Suffice it to say that obviously we all know English girls have big bottoms (it is after all an empirically proven science fact) and I am English ('cos it say's so on my birth cert.) therefore, I must very logically be in posession of an English girls big bottom >insert some latinesque sounding bullshit to make all this sound legitimate here<