Kee-RYST! What horrific tales. I'm glad to say that I have been managing to totally avoid such forced familial get-togethers for many years now, and so have not had this sort of thing inflicted on me in a long time. I eat out a lot, and I have managed to find a handful of restaurants around here that are both good...and inexpensive.

Thinking back now, though....the worst things I have ever been served and which still stick in my memory were 2 cases of REALLY bad coffee. I remember 2 instances of this that went far beyond the "normally bad" to reach the "downright astounding". One was from a coffee truck that came around to some place I was working at, trying to poison people to death on their break. That guy's coffee was badly overdone, but that's not all...it had a weird extra taste in it that tasted like...burnt peanuts. I kid you not. Godawful.

The other was from a greasy spoon called Black Cat Fish & Chips. Their coffee was somehow both overdone and criminally weak at the same time, with a distinct added flavor of dish detergent. I never had their fish & chips, and if it was as bad as the coffee then I figure it's a good thing I didn't!

To be a really good cook is one of the most valuable things one can possibly be, in my opinion. For a real treat, watch the Disney film "Ratatouille" about a humble rat who becomes the greatest chef in all France. It's a mouthwateringly wonderful movie.