Now, my favorite alterative name for today's celebration (New Years' Eve) is...

AMATEUR NIGHT

...when all the people who really don't know how to drink decide, all at once, to get rip-roaring loaded.

Not the best time to be out driving the roads, even if you're the desigated temporary teetotaler. Better to stay home and watch the idiotic revelers on TV. (There'll be over a million individuals out in NTC's Times Square later tonight, enduring a predicted wind-chill-factor of ZERO degress Fahrenheit!)