I don't understand either side of this apparently two-sided conflict, which has been in play all my long life.

I can only surmise, therefore, that the two-sided picture is false, and that a third, and possibly a fourth and fifth party, are energetically and continuously involved in perpetuating the hatred.

I have known young people from Israel and SYria, each firmly raised in their cultures, who came to America and lived in complete harmony with each other.

IF the whole concepts of "racial types" and "mandatory cultural beliefs" were recognized as the horseshit they are, things might move along; but as long as some voices are perpetually using these phony categories to insist on us-versus-them, under-versus-over, us-right-them-wrong dichotomies, which are complete distortions of the ground truth involved, the tribulations will persist.