A point here, Tam. Men and women talk face-to-face differently. women are much more conciliatory with each other than men are, and men take the micky out of their friends much more than women do.

Although this place usually feels like a meeting, it isn't really, because most of us will never actually meet each other. Often, it takes years (because as Azizi says, we write no bio's) to realise which gender the others are, particularly if they post seldom, and their handle is not gender-specific. Or is a little misleading internationally, like yours, Tam being the common Scots for Thomas.
So, if someone treats you more robustly than you expect, it may be just that he (usually he) can't see you. I have noticed that the known and openly female members get more politeness than the known males do!

The first lesson I learned was, proofread! Everyone will pick you up if you make a funny mistake, English being our medium of contact. It really isn't personal, we pick everyone up! See WYSIWYG's post up there for an example. Some people post in patois as a defence.
So, welcome to Mudcat from me too. You sound like our kind of person. That is, you have opinions and you are prepared to air them, and to speak up for yourself.