Inmeandering through the ancient Jungles of MOAB I came across a Great and Ancient Calumny, buried in vines and overgrown with mosses,.

As I cutt away the thick creepers and tore the leaves away from its weathered surface, lo!! It was of the Ancient One they called, in those days, Tweed of Tweed's Alley!!

In sooth, this is what the wse and ancient Tweed said unto the MOABITES:

"From: Tweed - PM
Date: 03 Dec 03 - 07:31 PM

Penelope Rutledge iz a harpy of the lowest order, Liddle Hargue, and my mos' saje device to you iz stay clear of her. Her tongue is lined wif straight razors and she swills raw Sterno straight from the can. Thar iz no depth obv depravity thet this woman will sink to in order to cut the balls off ob a man, or beast, fish or fowl.

I hab suffered horrible from her scabrous attacks in the passed an' am only now recouped inough to eben respond in a sesnble manner to yore query.

I ain't sure what or who "She" iz but I would not trust her wif my goat nor sleep next to her fer enny lenthg ob time!

Yerz,
Tweed"



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