I was volunteering daytimes with a summer camp for inner city kids, held at an outdoor ed facility that included a working demonstration farm. My job was helping to give the hands-on tours at the farmette, and the farm manager and I became good friends.

He was a very funny and smart guy who was totally committed to the Lord, despite his own wicked sense of humor. His specialty at the farmette was his own flock of custom-bred sheep. I was fascinated with the Jesus side of him, but much more intrerested in the friendship. See I was not quite the Christian I am now.... just coming back to such things, see, with his example....

So I thought it would be a good idea to go with the sheep and humor aspect..... one day an old ewe died just as the fella was on his way outta town for some reason, and so instead of burying her, he dragged the carcass into the barn and put her in a crate, ready to take out in the tractor bucket when he got back a few days later. He had always emphasized farm cleanliness and health, and I thought this highly unhygienic and hypocritical. Wouldn;t farm visitors find this somewhat shocking? So to make my point I snuck on the property that night at 1AM with a can of Rustoleum and painted her toenails bright red. She was bloated with gas and quite ripe smelling by the time he returned, but her feet were gorgeous sticking out of the crate at that odd angle.

Later that summer I also put an anatomically correct inflatable sheep in the front passenger seat of his pickup. I'm sorry. Celibacy outside marriage just did not make sense to me at that time.

That was about it until the late fall, when I thought he was behind with his Christmas decorating.... I snuck into his cottage on the farm with a shopping-cart full of cheap trashy Christmas decorations, including wrapping paper. I used the wrapping paper to wallpaper the tiny bathroom, using tape of course, not glue, and then layered everything else on over it, including the ceiling full of musical blinking lights. It was a complete job, down to the miniature book (The Night Before Christmas) hung on a tack next to the TP roll, handy for reading material.... and the musical whatsit I put under the toilet seat that played when raised..... then I retreated to a nearby hill to watch for his return, in case the whole thing caught fire and I had to call 911... Well how was I supposed to know that this was to be the day he and his girlfriend were bringing her parents there for the first time, to announce their engagement?

Then there was the huge plastic rat that I would move from location to location, in the toilet, in the cupboards, in the feed bin, etc.....

~S~