Having come very close to losing my own extraordinary kid, my heart just aches for you, my dear. I remember the shear terror at the thought, the unfathomable hurt at the loss of my surrogate daughter, and the questioning, doubt and blame I put on myself for not doing some things that might have saved us all the grief.

But I must tell you that I find your unflinching way of dealing with the pain and guilt to be inspirational. I have, since you came to Mudcat, enjoyed your posts and views. I now add "admiration and inspiration" to enjoyment. You are special, and that is why your extraordinary girl was special. We are not in command of the fates, just how we deal with the fates. You are in the fight, and I am rooting for you. In fact, I am laying odds that you will deal with this, with sadness, but better than most.

In your corner,

Mick