I can tell ya exactly what is wrong with Amos. I guess you think he was just layin' around in the sun and drinkin' Margaritas, huh? Well, think again. I'll tell ya what he was really doin' in the sunny south, he was engagin' in way too much cavortin' around after hours with them proskirts down there, that's what! And now he is all "tuckered" out, if ya know what I mean...

He ain't got no bullets left. His tommy gun is empty. His kazoozle has kafizzled. His zuchinni has wilted. He ain't even got blanks left to fire. Elvis has left the friggin' building.

Yessiree, I know his type. They get off in some foreign land where they figger no one knows 'em and they go crrrrraAAAAZY!

I seen it enough times to know. Yup. I wasn't born at the bottom of a mine shaft. No siree.

That business with Chinga was only the tip of the iceberg. This guy has slid down the slippery slope to perdition and he ain't comin' back.

****

In regards to yer ex, Janie, count yer lucky stars that you are at least takin' steps to get clear of that guy. And watch yer back. Consider hirin' a local chimp or gorilla for security purposes. They'll work for bananas.