There was an old farmer who lived by a rock
He sat in the meadow a'shaking his
Fist at some boys who were down by the crick
Their feet in the water, their hands on their
Marbles and playthings as in days of yore
There came a young lady, she looked like a
Pretty young creature, she sat on the grass
She pulled up her dresses and showed us her
Ruffles and laces and white puffy duck
She said she was learning a new way to
Bring up her children and learned them to knit
While the boys in the barnyard were shoveling
Refuse and litter from yesterday's hunt
While the girl in the meadow was rubbing her
Eyes at the fellows as girls sometimes do
To make it quite clear that she wanted to
Go for a nice pleasant stroll in the grass
Then hurry back home for a nice piece of
Ice-cream and cake at the three-layered stall
And after desert she was ready to
Go for another walk down by the dock
With any young man with a sizable
Roll of one-hundreds and a big bulge of rum
If he'd ask politely she'd show him her
Little fat dog who was subject to fits
And maybe she'd let him grab hold of her
Small tender hand with a movement so quick
Then she'd bend on over and suck on his
Soda so sweetly till she'd finished it
Then pull down her panties to rub on her
Hip that she'd bruised when she'd ran down the hall
Cause he tried to force her to lick on his
Candy. Then they both made a butter scotch
And then he spread whipped-cream all over her
Cookies that she had been baking all night
If you think this is dirty you're FUCKING-WELL RIGHT!