Re: Tyke's question about Dog Fat. The song was written by Jack Lee from Rochdale who ran a number of clubs there, and is still running one - see http://www.folkimages.com/hobo/menu.html
Dog Fat by Jack Lee (originally – see below)
1 One day a knock came on the door and when I answered it An old man he were standing there, he were having a coughing fit I asked him what's he selling and he quickly doffed his hat He coughed and sneezed and cleared his throat and then he said "Dog fat".
Chorus:
Come and get your dog fat, dog fat oh he cried That's the only ointment that can penetrate your hide Rub it smartly on your chest or rub it on your back If you've got a pain you'll ne'er complain if you rub it with dog fat. Dum a diddley di do, dum a diddley day.
2 Dog fat is fair for falling hair, it cures the griping pain If you use it neat it's good for your feet, makes cripples walk again It'll surely take spots off your face and burst boils on your back It'll cure with ease rheumatic knees, oh rub 'em with dog fat.
3 My dad has always wanted curly hair on his bald head But medical science can't do a thing, that's what the doctor said But yesterday he rubbed a lump of dog fat in the strands When he got up this morning he'd got hair all over his hands.
4 There used to be a girl who thought her figure was not complete Oh yes, she had a pretty face, and her legs were rather neat But her chest was flat, so she used dog fat as bust developing cream When she woke up another little bust had grown in between.
5 Constipation were troubling Ada Plum, it drove her in a tiz She'd heave and strain and squeeze her head, but still she couldn't biz Then she took a dog fat suppository and quickly lost her frown She had to get off toilet twice to stamp the bugger down.
6 Well it's good for your lungs and it's champion for your heart And it cleans out your stomach, every last little part And if you want a contraceptive girls, dog fat's the thing for you Just stick a lump between your knees, it sticks like bloody glue.
Dog Fat - The Guilty Men
Verses 1,2, chorus Jack Lee
Verses 3,4 Slightly adapted by Paul Reade (couldn't remember Jack's original verses which are):-
3 My dad has always wanted curly hair on his bald head But medical science can't do a thing, that's what the doctor said But yesterday he rubbed a lump of dog fat in the roots When he got up this morning he'd got hair down to his boots.
4 There used to be a girl who thought her figure was not complete Oh yes, she had a pretty face, and her legs were rather neat But her bust was small, and though she tried all the ointments from the quack Now her bust is forty-four, with rubbing 'em with dog fat.