The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #124840   Message #2760614
Posted By: eddie1
06-Nov-09 - 02:12 AM
Thread Name: BS: Business speak
Subject: RE: BS: Business speak
In a life long ago and far away, I was a member of a group planning and conducting training for part-time community education workers. Someone came up with the idea for a "Jargoniser!
All you need are three columns, (1) a list of adverbs, (2) a list of adjectives and (3) a list of nouns. Take any word from each of the three columns and use them together.
We had a secret competition as to who could sneak the greatest number of these into one talk/lecture. Trainees would nod their heads sagely, not wanting to make it look as if they didn't understand.
I remember "Alternately transactional derivatives" as a prime example and "Paradoxically evasive functionalities" as another.
One of the group produced a working model composed of four cardboard discs of reducing sizes with the top one having slits cut in it to reveal the three words. He should have marketed it!
This was pre-computers. I'm sure it would be easy to produce a "Randomly non-dialectic selective pre-inhibitor programme" that would do the trick.

Amaze your friends, baffle your superiors, astound your downline!
A percentage of all royalties to me please.

Eddie