I came across these lyrics when I was looking up something for the current Broadway thread. Gee, I'd love to hear a recording of this. I wonder what tune Cole Porter used.
-Joe Offer-

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TWO LITTLE BABES IN THE WOOD
(Cole Porter)

Published February 1928, with other songs from Paris (1928). Introduced by Julia Silvers and George Hale. Dropped from the Greenwich Village Follies before October 13, 1924. Porter made a piano-vocal recording for Victor (24825) on November 27, 1934. Irene Bordoni, who sang it in Paris, recorded it on May 3 and June 24, 1928, but neither recording was released.
The version printed here was found at the Warner Brothers Music warehouse in Secaucus, New Jersey. It includes the words and music for the two announcements that precede the two verses. The announcements were dropped from the 1928 Paris version.


PART I. ANNOUNCEMENT.


Listen, my children, and don't say a word.

Now, you'll grant me that Denmark has ne'er had a grander son,
Than her great author, old Hans Christian Andersen.
All of you know him, so just to be good to you,
I'll tell his tale of the Babes in the Wood to you.


VERSE 1


There's a tale of two little orphans who were left in their uncle's care,
To be reared and ruled and properly schooled
Till they grew to be ladies fair.
But, oh, the luckless pair!
For the uncle, he was a cruel trustee,

PART II. ANNOUNCEMENT.

Listen, my children, and don't say a word.

Now in spite of all efforts to strengthen and quicken it,
Andersen's tale never had any kick in it.
So his descendant, John Murray, in fantasy,
Added a scene for the tired businessman to see.

VERSE 2

They were lying there in the freezing air,
When fortunately there appeared
A rich old man in a big sedan,
And a very, very fancy beard.
He saw those girls and cheered,
Then he drove them down to New York town,
Where he covered them with useful things,
Such as bonds, and stocks, and Paris frocks,
And Oriental pearls in strings,
And a showcase full of rings.

REFRAIN 2

Now those two little babes in the wood,
Are the talk of the whole neighborhood,
For they've too many cars, too many clothes,
Too many parties, and too many beaux,
They have found that the fountain of youth
Is a mixture of gin and vermouth,
And the whole town's agreed
That the last thing in speed
Is the two little babes in the wood.

Source: The Complete Lyrics of Cole Porter, by Robert Kimball, 1983.
JRO