Janie, Katlaughing, my first post in this thread was about combining CBT and the (all-secular) RC with great spiritual disciplines already in place. RC is a way of laughing and shaking off old, recorded fears so that a more accurate approach can come more easily to mind; CBT is (as we know) a route to finding where the laughs are, as well as an effective set of tools for trying and overcoming "scary" situations. I have found both CBT and RC essential in redrawing and re-stating boundaries that are not about what the other person is "allowed" to do but about how I respond to whatever they may do.

A nice thing about CBT is that its practitioners encourage self-directed use on one's own. Certainly a therapist skilled in it is a help to getting it going-- but it is not therapy-dependent.

Upward and forward!

~S~