Soldiers Mourn the Passing of a Strange VIsitor

KANDAHAR, AFGHANISTAN UPI December 31 2009 First Sergeant Mack "Mack" McEvoy, of the First Airborne, told reporters in Kandahar today that his whole battalion was deeply saddened by the sudden loss of Chongo Chimp to an IED a few miles outside the Green Zone. "For some reason, we had all grown to really like the little bastard", McEvoy said. "He was like a cross between Godzilla and Bugs Bunny, and everyone got a kick out of him."

On hearing that their visiting friend had been unexpectedly taken out by an IED, members of the battalion decided to submit a petition to the Obama Administration to have him awarded the Purple Heart despite the fact that Mr. Chimp was not a member of any Armed Service unit known to the U.S. Government.

"We know there's not much chance of it getting approved, but we felt we oughta try. He was good people", one Pfc. was heard to remark.