Very wise advice,Chanteyranger. My father died a year ago Aug. 15. He had a chronic illness that was terminal, and because of his slow decline I was able to put aside old conflicts and "get things right" with him over a period of months. I am so grateful I had this opportunity. I have worked as a nurse for many years and have seen many families that did not have a chance to do this, when illnesses or accidents happened suddenly. I hope your advice is heeded. Forgiveness happens if we are able to open our hearts. My family, incidentally, had a gathering that included singing some of the songs we sang at my dad's funeral. It was a bit awkward, since it is a new process for us to be publicly demonstrative, but ultimately it felt like we had honored our father with the remembrance.