Typical Naval Joke -

  The Commander-in-Chief, a full Admiral, visits his domain, the local Naval Base and Dockyard, one sunny summer's day.
  Accompanying him is his pretty, six-year-old, blonde, curly-haired, adorable little daughter. She is, like her father, immaculately turned-out, and carries a rather fetching little parasol. Upon entering through the Dockyard gate, the Admiral is saluted, with a "present arms" by a sailor on sentry duty.
  After these formalities, the little girl says "Daddy, may I go and talk to that sailor?"
  "Alright" says father, "but don't be long."
  Tugging at the still-rigid sentry's trousers, she says, "Hullo! I want you to talk to me!"
  "Well now, that's a very fine parasol you have there," comes the somewhat unimaginative reply.
  Stamping her feet angrily, the little girl says, "No! No! I want you to say something NAUTICAL!"
  To which the sailor replies, through gritted teeth, "You can shove your fucking parasol right up your fucking arse!"