Then there was a wealthy butcher who bought a cattle ranch for his twin boys. They couldn't agree a name for the ranch, so they asked him for a suggestion. He suggested they call it the FOCUS ranch. Why? 'Cos the FOCUS is where the sun's rays meet. [sons raise meat]

And those of you familir with a certain washing-up liquid won't want to know about the rare light-green moustached sea creature...........Yes, it's a mild green hairy-lipped squid.