And I'll tell you something else, Dave.

When I was around 19, I worked in a chemist shop in Eastcote. One of our customers there was a young woman with cerebral palsy. She was very badly affected, muscle spasms throughout her face and body. She was a terrific fighter though! She'd limp in to the shop every single Saturday morning to come and talk to me, as we'd got talking one day and kind of connected.   I always made time to go and have a natter with her.

She shouted, I guess her vocal muscles were also affected, and it took her a long time to get her words out...but hell, I used to have a terrible stutter as a young child, so I was there with her, and waited patiently for her to speak.

One day, she brought a young man in with her...John. She proudly introduced him to me and I shook his hand. She told me how much they loved one another...and John smiled.

He was blind.

He didn't see the outside of her, but the inside..and he *loved* what he saw in her soul...They were so happy.

Then, after they'd gone, Richard, the owner of the chemist walked up to me. "Scotch.." he said (a nickname he used for me)..."I don't want her in here anymore. She puts the customers off! Next time she comes in, I'll serve her."

I was shocked...I just stared at him, couldn't believe how bloody heartless he was. He was a doctor's son, as well, but money meant all to him....

Next time she came in, I was serving someone else, and he rushed over to her. He served her so abruptly, so rudely...and she knew straight away!   She never came back. I never forgave him for that...and shortly after that I left.

I've never forgotten that. Never forgotten how she must have felt. She came in because, in her words "You treat me like I'm normal'...She was normal, it was Richard who was the one who was not.
He hurt her, and he hurt her deeply. He was an absolute bastard....

So would I want highly sensitive people being surrounded by characters like him, who so often do life-long damage to the gentlest of souls? No.   The only way mainstream school would work is if EVERY autistic child has a one to one fully trained and sympathetic teacher/carer who is there for them at all times, throughout the school day, not only to help calm their fears, but to keep them safe from some of the cruel little kids who don't give a damn what they say or do to anyone they deem 'different'.   

Surely, that is right?

Ben was left all alone, to cope all alone...His teachers didn't want to know, they just moaned to his Mum about his behaviour, whilst completely overlooking the behaviour of the other children.

Hannah, mainstream school, right?   SIDMOUTH COLLEGE, Dave....fucking Sidmouth College...!!!! Punched in the face, treated like a *dog* by the other girls..."Get this, Hannah!" "Get that, Hannah!" "Do this, Hannah!" "Do that, Hannah!" and that poor child did all they asked, because she was so terrified. She never told her parents, and it was my daughter who told me.... *I* told her parents....and I also told them how those girls said to Hannah, just before her piano exam, that they hoped she'd fail, because her piano playing stank and she was useless and weird.

Every morning before she had to go to school, Hannah played her beloved piano for an hour or more, almost drawing strength from it, for her day ahead in 'jolly mainstream fucking school!'.....She was and still is THE MOST GIFTED PIANIST I have ever heard! She makes the tears flow...and she is lost, utterly, totally lost in her music, going to another place, just as my daughter does when she paints......finally in a land they love, where they feel safe.....and where they are at home, where they understand their world....

Shortly after she was hit in the face, her parents finally woke up, came and talked to me and I told them to get her out and to get her out fast. They took her out the next day. She never went back.

They moved away from Sidmouth, despite adoring the place, as their daughter was terrified, at age 15, to go out of the front door. They moved to Dartmoor.

So don't tell me that mainstream school is a great place for all autistic children, because it ain't!   Many of them are in grave danger there, and they cannot explain that to their parents, because emotions come hard to them, they have trouble getting those feelings out, so they simply 'endure'...

Sorry, but Ben's life, after he changed schools was supremely better in every single way...because he was CARED for and that state system does not DO caring of it's children in the way it should, because it's too damn busy getting too few teachers to tick too many tick boxes. It is result driven, not soul driven.