"Lawyers Q&A"

Did you hear about the new sushi bar that caters
exclusively to lawyers?
It's called, Sosumi.

How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying
a future lawyer?
She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.

How does an attorney sleep?
First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.

If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning,
and you could only save one of them, would you go
to lunch or read the newspaper?

What are lawyers good for?
They make used car salesmen look good.


What did the terrorist that hijacked a jumbo-jet full
of lawyers do?
He threatened to release one every hour if his
demands weren't met.


What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their
chins in cement?
Not enough cement.

What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?
Skeet.

What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
Senator.

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?
Your Honor.

What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
His partners.

What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?
One is a bloodsucking parasite, the other is an insect.

Why does California have the most lawyers in the country,
and New Jersey have the most toxic waste sites?
New Jersey got first choice!