I'm going to wrap myself up in the shawl that Jacqui sent and melt into the hugs it holds.

There's part of me that says ok....the report will say what it says and we'll find out what's the next step to getting me healthy. Then there's the other part that is scared shitless. I don't want a port. I don't want to be sick all the time. I don't want to lose my hair.

But I DO want to be healthy and so I will do whatever it is I need to do and lean when I need to lean.

What I need now is a hug.

:( Michelle