I'm afraid that neither your poetry, your playing nor your singing are of a standard that I would ever book you, David, paid or unpaid. You have pressed me on this before. I'm sorry.

The problem is that all of your certificates and your degree clearly AREN'T making you employable in your chosen field, and haven't done for some time. So why are you so resistant to trying another career path?

'"Do you not find it something of a paradox that it's the taxes of immigrants like me that are paying your way"...no: there has been a lot of pro-immigrationsim, as I HAVE already said, under New (over the border Scots) Labour, and (one thing we can all agree on) I'm the opposite - a repatriate.'

But my point is, David, that the difference between you and me is that, regardless of where either of us was born, I am working. I am paying my taxes - income, council etc. When my daughter was old enough to go to school I went back to university and re-trained for the career I have now, and did crap part-time work in the meantime so that I was still contributing. I have never taken a penny in benefit from this country. Do you not see the fundamental irony of sitting on your arse, on the dole, and railing about immigration, when it's partly our labours that keep a roof over your head and put food in your mouth?