I was rather remiss when I found out he was doing innuendoscopes this morning also. I coulda got a two-for-one! I mean, I had to be there anyway.

Hehehee... the prep nurse jabbed the IV in the crook of my left elbow and said, "Oh dear." I said, "We just met." She had a foul look on her face and said, "I can't see valves and I can't feel valves... I can only find them." She tried pumping some saline in to see if she could get a flow. Then she looked at the back of my right hand and said, "That looks like a good one." Worked a treat. I have two nice bruises. Small spuds, but when it's not necessary... you know.

The exam room nurse, Clara Voyant, asked me if I enjoyed the final Brier game last night. I looked surprised and then puzzled when I said yes. She said, "Oh. I can smell beer on anyone who has had even one in the last 24 hours. I was a triage nurse for 27 years." The doc told me to open wide and said, "The only way to describe the taste of this numbing spray is skunk piss." Then Clara says, "He's used to skunk piss." How did she know I was drinking Bud while watching the curling game?