(Shh! I'm wearing Groucho glasses, my hat is pulled down low over my eyes, and the collar of my trench coat is turned up! Your not s'posed to know it's really me!)

Spittoons at folk venues would come in very handy in a number of situations that can come up. For example (speaking of things that can come up), if someone should happen to drink too much out of the mandatory pitchers and need to up-chuck, there should be a spittoon within—well—spitting distance. Even though sounds of retching from all over the room would quite probably distract from the singer (which, by the way, may not be a bad thing), it would save a lot of mopping up afterward.

One should have an ironclad contract with the proprietor of the venue in question that the spittoons would be supplied free of charge. We don't want exorbitant changes limiting the right of people to enjoy singing, listening to others sing, drinking until our eyeballs float, and barfing our guts up.

In addition, perhaps we should conduct pre-session workshops to teach people how to belch in a variety of rhythms.

All of this should, of course, be mandatory.

*#2 Pheasant*
(The proud bird with it's head up its tail.)