(Riters, Pocatello, Idaho) Last night at a Change of Command Ceremony, the Colonel-General Smite-Withers of the Idaho Legion stepped down saying, "I'm really thirsty...who's buyin'?" She turned the post over to Roxanne Smite-Withers, to whom she is related by some sort of genetic trick. "Poxy Roxy", as the new Commandant is known to one and all, will assume the rank of General-Feldmarschall und Oberste Führer auf der Legion von Idaho.

Poxy Roxy bought drinks for the house. Her assumption of command was celebrated in the usual ways, finally involving the police.