This seems to be what we now have :


La la la la la la la la la la la la la laro
Gondolier, he he he he, ha ha ha ha

A gondola owner in Venice
I had been since the age of discretion, thirteen
But today gondoliering in Venice
Is a most overcrowded profession
You can't swing a cat sir around the piazza
The Palace of Doges is full of old fogies
And by the San Marco there's nowhere to park-o
It wasn't for me
So I went out to sea
And caused a commotion by crossing the ocean
Becoming the only original gondolier, gondolier
On the Manchester Ship Canal

On board my gondola I serve Coca-Cola
In flagons which once held Chianti
And for five bob a night I would sing or recite
From a bowdlerised version of Dante
The Transport Commission gave me their permission,
One gondola, canal or Thamesis
And when I made obeisance they threw in my licence
For vino consumed on the premises
When I sing unsoberly La donna è mobile
People in houseboats complain
Of my gay barcarolle
So I stick in my pole
And sing it again and again

La la la la la la la la la la la la la laro
Gondolier, he he he he ha ha ha

A gay gondolier as I shoot every weir
And I shout as I sit in Venezia
O who wants to fondle a girl in my gondola
Up come the river policia
Oh, bacciare inside the cabina
The Englishman travels in style
With a young senorita
My gondolin meter
Is clicking up three-pence a mile
So, tied to a jetty I eat my spaghetti
And drink 'til I'm properly plastered
Shouting "bog off on starches" to bargees on barges
Who shouting reply "you're a *****"
It's a lie
For it's ever so much fun you will find
On my Anglo-Venetian blind.

Any more suggestions?
Ian