Asked of an old time Texas Ranger, "Why do you carry a .45"?
Reply,
"Because they don't make a .46."

For a while I was wearing my Grammy award nomination medal and a few people asked what it was. One middle age woman in the post office asked, "Is that an Olympic gold medal"? I said, "Yes, I'm so proud of it I had it bronzed."

Went right over her head.