Peter! you've been holding out on us! 'Course I know yer a world traveller, respected author, daring environmentalist, free lance philosopher, artist, actor, director, softball player, and courageous enough to tackle songs with Joan Sutherland's range, but Henny Youngman?!

Who was that Ladle I saw you with last night?

That was no ladle, that was my knife!

Rick (frustrated sit-down comic)