Duct and Cover by reggie miles 2003
reggie's Comments: I just got around to reading that duct tape thread from last month and my last remaining brain cell managed to squeeze out this little dittie. Submitted for your approval.
The threat of war is loomin',
Anthrax bombs may soon be zoomin',
To your bedroom in the suburbs but don't despair.
From deep within his mountain bunker,
Where Gee Dubbya's gonna hunker,
A solution to our dilemma he's sure to share.
Our best scientific minds,
Were charged to seek and find,
An all American answer to our plight,
And with the billions spent,
On research by government,
They finally discovered one that works just right.
Yes they've found it girls and boys.
Protection from those evil toys,
Affordable and available throughout the land,
Yankee ingenuity,
Has triumphed once again you see,
Providing health and safety to every woman, child, and man.
And what miracle is this,
That secures our freedom bliss,
And ensures all our blessed liberties?
What treasure is it, made by man,
That can do, what no other can,
This creation of our modern technolullogies?
It's the simplest things they say,
That can always save the day,
And it's oh so very true in this case too.
You needn't build a big bomb shelter,
You can avoid the helter skelter.
Listen closely here is what they say to do.
Just duct tape and cover your windows and your door,
With plastic sheeting you can buy at any hardware store.
It's an easy thing to do no matter if you're rich or poor,
And much cleaner than crawling 'neath your desk down on all four.
It's a lesson we've all learned in school, fifty years ago.
When we feared that the idea of droppin' A-bombs would grow.
They've changed the words to suit our times.
Instead of duck and cover rhymes.
Now we just duct tape and cover instead.
It kind of makes you wonder,
Why Gee Dubbya's way down under,
Neath the mountain in his little hidy hole.
When all he needs to do,
Is just follow me or you,
To buy some plastic sheeting and some duct tape by the roll.
Then he could duct tape and cover his windows and his door,
With plastic easily bought from any hardware store.
No need to kiss his butt goodbye,
When missiles fall down from the sky,
When he can duct tape and cover instead.