In a Humanities class in college I had to read Thomas Mann's _The Magic Mountain_. We had three months in which to read it (along with all the other materials in the course). Now you should understand that received critical opinion is that Thomas Mann was a great master of literary style. I found this the most dull and depressing book I could possibly imagine. I kept putting it down, picking it up later, putting it down, and so on ad nauseam. Finally, three days before the final, in desperation I put on full steam--No-Doz and Cokes, until four in the morning, just trying to drudge through this wearying mess.

Finally, at 5:30 in the morning, with the final test for the quarter at 11:00, I realized that I'd do better to get some sleep because there was no way I was going to be able to finish the durn book.

I found my way through a fog of left-over sleep to the exam room. The exam, as it applied to _The Magic Mountain_, gave a choice of four questions on which to write. One choice, to my joy, was something like, "Does Settembrini represent the voice of Thomas Mann himself?" Oh, frabjous day! Calloo! Callay! I remembered an actual quote from THE VERY LAST PAGE I HAD READ AT 5:30 THAT MORNING that, quoted directly with some little comment on my part, gave the answer (which, in short, was yes").

I'm happy to say that I got an A in the course, and the instructor had marked the _Magic Mountain_ section of test booklet with a flattering comment. Thank god for having quit where I did!

Dave Oesterreich