Portaferry Mudcats by Micca
(Tune:  Galway Bay) (originally posted on this thread)

Maybe someday I'll go back to Portaferry
And hear again that lively music scene
To join the Mudcats there a making merry
And watch the Guiness sink in Fiddlers Green

When we got there we said "It's the edge of nowhere"
"It isn't" said big John ,"but Never fear"
If the rain stops, and the sun comes out tomorrow
You'll get damn good view of it from here

And did it Rain? Oh bless me, this is Ireland
It poured down like the sky'd begun to crack
But we were snug and warm inside the Fiddlers
A drinking that vile stuff that's coloured black

In Dumicans we drank a lot of porter
You ask me how I know? Well here's the proof
I was on my 13th visit to the toilet
Before I noticed that it had no roof

Now Skipjacks Birthday it occurred in Ireland
And we all signed a card for his good sake
And smiled when he was given a small prezzie
His very own DIY birthday cake

We sang a lot and stayed late at the drinking
And some played music till the early dawn
Including many tunes of Local vintage
And no one seemed to notice No Bodhran!!!

How did we entertain ourselves between times?
even Irish pubs must sometimes close, alas
we drank a lot of tea, and wine from boxes
and Jude and Cat give seminars on Bras

No mention will be made of all the farting
Or of jiving in the pub on Saturday night
And you know that we are too polite to mention
The night time noises from the poltergeist

John Moulden, John and Jacky sang so sweetly
And Frank and his musicians, they were grand
The local folks made welcome all these strangers
And everyone played like it was one band

Oh Maybe someday I'll go back to Ireland
If the Mudcats meet again in County Down
I'll return again to rest myself in Barholm
And enjoy again the welcome in the town