SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 12

Okay, Christmas/Kwanzaa/Chanukkah/Festivus/Solstice/Your-Festival-Goes-Here is almost upon us! We can give one another a wonderful holiday gift by writing funny songs!

And what better to write funny songs about than a bizarre news item culled from the World Wide Interweb?

Burglar bakes, surfs and leaves

JACKSONVILLE, Fla., Nov. 28 (UPI) -- A burglar invaded a house in Florida while the owners were away for Thanksgiving, baked brownies and used a computer to look at porn sites, police said.

A neighbor discovered the intruder Thanksgiving morning, The Florida Times-Union in Jacksonville reported. The Jacksonville couple who live in the house had asked the neighbor to keep an eye on it, and he was concerned when he saw the garage door was open.

When the neighbor used a spare key to get in, he found a young man in the living room who pulled out a gun, police said. The weapon had been stolen from the bedroom.

Police surrounded the house. But when they went inside, they found it empty.

They did find signs that someone had been active in the kitchen, baking brownies, and had slept in the owners' bed. They found a nylon bag full of liquor bottles taken from the house on the front seat of a van in the garage, suggesting the burglar had been planning to steal the van as well.

The computer had been used with porn sites recently accessed.

The burglar apparently got in by using the remote control from an unlocked car in the driveway to get into the garage.

Okay, let's hear some great new lyrics!