I thought this was going to be about those low slung jeans that make even the slimmest of girls look fat by pinching in at the hip; not a good look...

I tend wear Italian air force cast-offs most of the time though around the house I like ASDA tartan pyjama bottoms.

If you want sandblasted, just hang them out on Blackpool dunes for a day or two.

Otherwise, the shocking truth of capitalism & fashion.

You can even get pre-worn electric guitars these daus, which actually don't look pre-worn at all - they're as battle-scarred as an airfix spitfire. Why I ask myself?