Last night I dreamt of a country pub adjoining on old church in Hereford in which Tudor Crisps were hosting a Sunday Folk session. Eliza Carthy and Norma Waterson were the guests, who for some reason wanted me to play with them. 'But I don't know the material,' I protested. ' - In fact, I haven't even got my fiddle.'
Eliza just shrugged, then handed me her fiddle which I noticed had frets on it tied on with bits of fishing line. 'Well that's something,' I said, relieved I wouldn't have to go fretless. ' - At least it's got frets on it like mine.'
'Ah - but does yours have wheels?' she says, showing me an intricate piece of skeletal brass clockwork affixed beneath the strings which wound up to power tiny hurdy-gurdy wheels. I looked on agog - never in my life had I seen anything quite so exquisitely crafted, as she wound it up and set it into motion, lifting the desired wheel into contact with the strings by means of ivory keys. Such was my excitement I went out to find Les and Spleen Cringe who were in the church serving soup to the punters. 'Les - Spleen - you've got to see Eliza Carthy's clockwork fiddle.'
But when we got back EC was playing an uncensored CD by Nicki Minaj, urging us to listen carefully. 'We're doing the next Waterson Carthy single with her,' she said, ' - Want to be on it, Sedayne?' But before I could answer, I woke up to the nesting seagulls raucously praising an all too iminent dawn in which I lay pondering what sort of wondrous thing a collaboration between Waterson Carthy and Nicki Menaj would result in...