"A Dog's Life"

I Lie belly-up
In the sunshine, happier than
You will ever be.

Today I sniffed
Many dogs' behinds - I celebrate
By kissing your face.

I sound the alarm!
Paper boy come to kill us all.
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I sound the alarm!
Garbage man come to kill us all.
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I lift my leg and
Whiz on each bush. Hello, Spot -
Sniff this and weep.

My human is home!
I am so ecstatic I have
Made a puddle.

I hate my choke chain.
Look, world, they strangle me!
Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack!

Look in my eyes and
Deny it. No human could
Love you as much as I do.

The cat is not all bad
She fills the litter box
With tootsie rolls.

My owners' mood is
Romantic - I lie near their
Feet, I rip a big one.