"Getting into Heaven"

Little Willie asked his mother: "Mama, don't
soldiers ever go to heaven?"

"Of course they do!" protested his mother.
"What makes you ask?"

"There are so many soldiers with beards, but I
never saw any pictures of angels with beards."

"Oh, that's because most MEN who go to Heaven
get there by a close shave."

-------

"Jose And Carlos"

Jose and Carlos are panhandlers. They panhandle
on different areas of town.

Carlos panhandles just as long as Jose but only
collects 2 to 3 dollars every day.

Jose brings home a suitcase FULL of $10 bills,
drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage free house
and has a lot of money to spend.

Carlos says to Jose, "I work just as long and hard
as you do, but how do you bring home a suitcase
full of $10 bills every day?"

Jose says, "Look at your sign; what does it say?"

Carlos sign reads, "I have no work, a wife and 6
kids to support."

Jose says, "No wonder you only get $2-3 dollars."

Carlos says, "So what does your sign say?"

Jose shows Carlos his sign......

It reads, "I only need another $10.00 to move back
to Mexico."