A rude wizard wearing a complete outfit of blue robes dappled with golden stars, Saturns, moons, and other numerous celestial bodies. He was obviously a wizard, and obviously rude because his floppy wizard chapeau was crowned with a a giant glittering phallus inscribed "Honolulu 1958". For a moment he stood peering in at the assembled unfortunates, then tossed a handful of gold glitter into the air, and entered saying "I am the Great Dildoni, Master of the Dark Arts, Seer of Truths, Deviner of Random Probabilities, Estimator of Karmic Inheritances, and Ukelele Professional."
From beneath his robe he produced a uke and strummed a D flat. then said "who's in charge here?"