I can't believe nobody has posted this gem. I stole it from The Brothers Frail Songbook
-Joe Offer-
NO FLIES
(Patrick Adair, words; Music by Patrick Adair, Jeff Gillis, Brian Toole, Wes Canaday)
--VERSE 1
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
'Cuz Jesus He ain't dead
Those are angels, not big buzzards
That are circling 'round His head
Well, if on Jesus you saw a fly
Then you'd be seein' wrong
'Cuz, yes, sir Jesus He did die
but He didn't stay that way for long
--CHORUS
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
No, there ain't no flies on Jesus
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
'Cuz Jesus He ain't dead
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
No, there ain't no flies on Jesus
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
'Cuz Jesus He ain't dead
--VERSE 2
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
'Cuz Jesus ain't deceased
He was barely in there long enough
For Him to get His grave-clothes creased
Yes, sir, Jesus is not dead
And Jesus does not stink
If that's the thought that's in your head
You better think another think
--CHORUS
--VERSE 3
Well, there ain't no grave for Jesus
'Cuz Jesus, He's alive!
Although He was beaten and cursed and mocked
And then was crucified
I know they put Him in the ground
But after that 3 day weekend
Jesus rose, my soul to save
He's my live and kickin' friend!
--CHORUS
I dare somebody to come up with the music for this. Apparently, it's from a 1969 musical called Salvation.
-Joe Offer-
Chords:
--VERSE 1
C
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
G
'Cuz Jesus He ain't dead
F
Those are angels, not big buzzards
C G
That are circling 'round His head
C
Well, if on Jesus you saw a fly
G
Then you'd be seein' wrong
F
'Cuz, yes, sir Jesus He did die
C G
but He didn't stay that way for long
--CHORUS
F
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
C G
No, there ain't no flies on Jesus
F
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
G C
'Cuz Jesus He ain't dead
F
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
C G
No, there ain't no flies on Jesus
F
Well, there ain't no flies on Jesus
G C
'Cuz Jesus He ain't dead