I shall never volunteer, stay right with God, write home, never feed the bears, treat every gun as if it were a loaded gun until I personally have proven otherwise, button up my overcoat, watch my back, have myself a merry little Christmas, look for bluebirds over the white cliffs of Dover, eschew the fatal glass of beer, never mix alcohol and gunpowder while keeping my powder dry, drive my car to the racing ground, ride off into the sunset, never tease an old dog or try to teach it new tricks, control myself, exhibit leadership qualities, just wait until I have children of my own, check the smoke detectors whenever the time changes, always buckle up, eat right, live fast, die young, and leave a good-looking corpse.