Complete Bollocks, Al.

You are a great writer and entertainer and I wish you every luck, but there is no 1% stopping folk clubs from booking you and you probably get paid more in working men's clubs (which is where, sadly, the great Emile Ford finished up, with backing tapes) - or pub gigs (which is where, sadly, Chicory Tip finished up, with backing tapes) - or doing marketing promo (which, sadly, is where the little one from "It ain't 'arf 'ot mum" finished up, with backing tapes).

I do however take offence if you are calling my daughter's singing "total bullshit and mediocrity". It would be a flattering description of mine, but she's all right.