Poor old Hartlepool. First it gets the monkey jokes, and then it gets Peter Mandelson as its MP.
At the risk of serious thread creep, the urbane and sophisticated Northern Ireland secretary and bon viveur was said once to be campaigning on the stump in Hartlepool when it was suggested he might like to show his street cred by popping into the local chippie for a pennorth of scratchings or what-have-you.
Mandy glances along the serving counter and his eyes alight on a bowl of green goo.
"Ah, so you have guacamole here too?" says Mandy to the bafflement of all.
"No mate, them's mushy peas," was the cruel but honest retort from the man behind the counter.
The tale's almost certainly apocryphal, but for anyone who knows Mandelson and Hartlepool (an unlikely pairing), it's priceless.