Since many of the nicknames mentioned above refer to the alleged slowness of trains, I thought this would be as good a place as any to insert a couple of slow-train jokes:

(1). I was riding on a train that came to a dead stop in the middle of nowhere. I asked the conductor what was wrong. He said, "There's a cow on the tracks."

After fifteen minutes, the train started up again. A half-hour later, it stopped again. I asked the conductor what was wrong this time. He said, "We caught up with the cow again."

(2). Everyone was complaining that the train was slow. The conductor got mad and said, "If you don't like it, you can get off and walk."

An old lady answered, "I would, only my folks aren't expecting me till the train gets there."

Apparently slow-train jokes and tall tales were an important part of our culture when people relied on trains for long-distance travel. There was even a best-selling joke book called "On a Slow Train Through Arkansaw [sic]: Funny Railroad Stories, Sayings of the Southern Darkies, All the Latest and Best Minstrel Jokes of The Day," by Thomas W. Jackson, originally published in 1903, and (I think) reprinted many times. I have a copy of a fairly recent reprint, which is probably where I learned the above. There is also a song in DT called "The Dummy Line" which incorporates some slow-train jokes. I have heard Michael Cooney sing it. There are more verses here.