That's right, Greg. If you see things in absolute terms and can't tolerate a billion-member church having a large number of assholes in management, then the Catholic Church won't work for you.

I'm in the Sacramento Diocese, and we had a wise, gentle, compassionate bishop while the neighboring bishop in Santa Rosa was having an affair with one of his priests and embezzling millions. Then we had a not-so-good bishop that I despised for his stupidity and insensitivity, and now we have a bishop I haven't decided upon. But Santa Rosa is one diocese out of the twelve in California, and none of the others had a bishop that was anywhere near the notoriety of that one bishop. Maybe I have greater tolerance, Greg. After all, I worked for the U.S. Government under a good number of assholes, and I survived and kept my integrity and did a good job.

And I despise Archbishop Chaput, formerly of Denver - just like you do. My sister, who had been a very active Catholic, left the Catholic Church when she was in Boston in the midst of Cardinal Law's coverup. If I had been in her shoes, I probably would have stayed and thought, but then I'm seminary-trained and know how to manipulate church bureaucracy and make progress in fighting the bad guys.

My wife and I went through "pre-Cana" sessions ten years ago when I was preparing to get married. We enjoyed the sessions, and I wasn't required to sign any pledges against birth control or anything like that. I guess it wouldn't make any difference - I had a vasectomy twenty years before, and all my pastor said was I should be sure that's what I wanted to do because it was permanent.

And I have never been a "Christian Soldier," putting up with anything in the Catholic Church that I thought was wrong. I have confronted priests for their drunkenness in front of parishioners, for dishonesty and misuse of funds, and for sexual misconduct. And, believe it or not, they straightened up. Mind you, none of these offenses were criminal - but they were still wrong. They appreciated the fact that I treated them honestly and with kindness.

I am an associate member of the Sisters of Mercy, and it was one of our sisters who was excommunicated by the Bishop of Phoenix for approving an abortion necessary to save the life of the mother - and we have given her absolute support.

But this is MY church and this is MY faith, and I'm not willing to abandon it to the assholes. I've fought too long and too hard, and I'm not going to give it all up. I respect you for leaving, Greg; and I'm sure you have good reason - but I still see a lot of good in my church along with the bad, and I'm not going to give it up. I had nothing but disdain for John Paul II, but I think Benedict is fairly reasonable. I've been in this church all my life. For the most part, it has been a wonderful experience. I've taken my lumps, lots of them; but I have never once compromised my integrity and never once failed to speak up when I saw something wrong. Never.

My pastor has some problems, but he's also one of the most compassionate people I know. It's amazing to see him deal with sick people, or perform a funeral or baptism. But still, he has a lot of issues, and I've hit him hard and steadily on those issues for the six years he's been here. He laid me off my job and has done a number of other things that hit me below the belt, but I'm still there to hassle him - and he knows he can't scare me away, and that I'll never give up. And he's developed a grudging respect for me because I'm honest and blunt and give him credit when he deserves it. He is a seriously flawed man, but he does a lot of good for a lot of people. Maybe because he is so flawed, he can express compassion in a way that I cannot.

Maybe we're all seriously flawed. Maybe it's time for us to accept that fact, and just keep doing the best we can and learn to accept the flaws of others.

-Joe Offer-

P.S. Silas, we knew the term "pagan babies" was a misnomer way back in the 1950s, when it was used by the Society for the Propagation of the Faith in fundraising campaigns in Catholic Schools. We made fun of the term way back then, and we had all sorts of jokes about the "pagan baby" campaign when I was in a Catholic seminary for 8 years in the 1960s. "Pagan" now has a more specific meaning and means more than simply "polytheistic religion." Modern Paganism covers the spectrum of "earth-based" religious beliefs and practices.