Here's the way we sing it at the Denver HHH:

The doggies had a meeting,
They came from near and far,
Some came by motorcycle,
Some came by motorcar.

Each doggy had a nametag,
Each doggy signed the book,
Each doggy hung his arsehole
Upon his very own hook.

One dog was not invited,
Imagine his great ire.
He ran into the crowded hall
And loudly shouted, "Fire!"

The dogs all ran in panic.
They had no time to look,
Each doggie grabbed an arsehole
From off another's hook.

And that's the reason why, sir,
Wherever you may roam.
And that's the reason why, sir,
On land or sea or foam.

And that's the reason why, sir,
A dog will leave it's bone
To sniff another's arsehole,
To see if it's his own.

I think the tune we use is "Susie Had a Steamboat".

BB,
NightWing