When you're in a railway train,
Never look out of the window pane,
I was in a carriage once
And did it to my regret.

It was just like this you see,
One of the passengers said to me,
Would you please look out of the window and see
if the train is starting yet?

Well I looked out of the window, my hat, it blew away,
I leaned down to get it, like an idiotic jay.
But my pants were tight and busted and
the passenger just behind, said
Oh! What a little short shirt you've got,
You'd better pull down the blind.

Another time on the train I went,
On the railway that goes to Kent,
I was in a carriage where a girl and fellow sat.
I felt rather out of place
and read the paper to hide my face,
but when the fellow kissed the girl
Oh my gosh, I couldn't stand that.

So I looked out of the window,when they began to spoon,
I thought it was a couple starting on their honeymoon,
but then the fellow whispered, "Would you be so kind,
The sun's very hot today,old top,
You'd better pull down the blind.