Yes, I use reference tracks, and you're right - it was a bit of a breakthrough for me when I started using them. You have to remember though, that they have been professionally mastered, so it's always worth turning their volume down about 5dB compared to yours. Otherwise you'll just tie yourself in knots trying to get your mix as loud as theirs.

But I've come to the conclusion, after a good 3 or 4 years in dabbling with home recording, that the best working method for me is not to attempt to mix my own stuff.

Recording at home, while a bit of a trial for me (and my partner, who despairs at the amount of messy leads, boxes and instruments cluttering up the flat), works better than studio recording. I just don't like studios. I'm reasonably happy with the basic quality of my raw material.

In fact the biggest breakthrough for me (other than using a Reference Track) has been using the front of my sitting room to record in. Even though it's pretty much at street level at the front of my flat (thus with the most ambient street noise) it has a high ceiling, about 9 feet, and sounds really clear, with a small amount of pleasing and non-woolly reverb to it.

But mixing is frankly a pain in the arse. I'd rather just hand it over to someone else.

There are places that do online mixing, at pretty cheap prices, and for me it's the way forward. All those hours in which you agonize over the relative volume of your vocal compared to your guitar etc are suddenly hours that you could be spending making more actual music, getting someone else to do the technical part that they are much, much better at.

(eg this studio in France does a mix package for 350 euros:
http://www.mixing-mastering-production-online.com)