You football supporters are soooooo boring! Why is this crap thrust down the throats of all of us who find football totally irrelevant every time we open a newspaper or switch on the telly - and now log in to Mudcat?

Modern football: An grossly over-hyped spectacle in which a handful of rich cretins kick a ball about for the diversion of a multitude of poor cretins!

Meanwhile hardly any football supporters seem to actually play football themselves any more; apart, that is, from a few louts who spend a few Sunday afternoons a year running about swearing at each other and leaving a mountain of litter behind them.