I guess this counts as decluttering...

This morning I wanted to sort some papers I found last week (correspondence with an "international bawdiologist" and rugby song collector I used to know) into a binder that was in the guest room. So I grabbed a binder that I haven't looked at in so long that I forgotten what was in it. Letters -- both to and from me (I've always kept copies). Started reading the most recent ones -- 1980 to 1981. Then discovered the collection is from about 1970 (when I married my first husband) through mid-1981 when I moved in with Tom here in Nottingham. I just read several of my letters to friends after my first husband tried to kill me because I was leaving and he and I (of course!) split up at that point. I haven't seen him since they carried me out of the house on a stretcher. Needless to say, I'm in a kind of weird space right now -- but so very very glad I've been in such a loving marriage for the past 30 years.

The letter describing the events immediately preceding the split was from October 1980. describing the afternoon and night of September 24th. I had made the decision to leave him at the end of May (long story as to what made me finally do it), but when you live in a resort area (Kennebunkport), there's nowhere to go to (that you can afford) during the season. I'd planned to have some "going out of marriage" yard sales to fund both of us, but he wouldn't go along with that.

He ended up deciding (evidently) that if I was dead or a paraplegic I couldn't leave him. It made sense to him. (That's the scary part.)

So, I'm in kind of a weird mental space right now...not only being reminded of that time, but the time between my divorce and meeting Tom, and also the early months of Tom's and my relationship (including my hesitancy to make a commitment, etc.). A bunch of things I'd "forgotten" are swirling around in my brain right now.

Linn