(sigh)

I keep wondering where you went wrong in life, Amos, when your train jumped the track, as it were. Yours is a sad case, my friend, and I feel for you. Like a brother. Yes, I can feel my eyes tearing up a little now just thinking about your plight. (Sniff!) (to quote Bobert)

"Let me make this perfectly clear..." (quoting Richard Nixon now)

To start with...ahem! "broke-dick jadrool"???? Okay, to begin with, you cannot break a dick. Well, not unless it's been frozen solid first. And if it has, it's really of no use any longer. So it wouldn't matter anymore if it got broken. You see, a dick has no bones in it, so it's flexible. You can't break it, not anymore than you can break a tongue. You follow? It bends, but it doesn't break. True, they don't bend as easily when they're...you know...but still, they don't break.

And..."jadrool"? What sort of term is that for a Mensa graduate to use? Good heavens, man, you weren't raised by your saintly mother to stoop so low as to use gutter language like "jadrool", a term that should only come out of the mouth of some filthy street urchin or cleat-wearing gang member from the bad side of Little Italy.

Then you speak of an "imaginary monkey". Could you be referring to our friend Chongo? I hope not! Chongo is an ape, not a monkey. The distinction is obvious and needs no further explanation. Were Chongo to hear that you had called him a monkey, he might take umbrage...extreme umbrage...and this might result in him doing something like going to San Diego and ripping your face off. That wouldn't be a desirable development. I suggest that you retract your statement.